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POP SINGER!

Video Director to leading singer of a very famous pop group

"You have Van Gogh's ear for music!"

Pop singer: "Oh Gee! Thanks!

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GENEROSITY OF SHOWFOLK!

At the end of his sensational 1960's season at the London Palladium,

LIBERACE gave all the artists and staff very expensive gifts.

At the end of her stint in Mame, GINGER ROGERS gave the orchestra

a bottle of sweets! NO! not each member - just the one bottle!!

When designing the lighting for the first production of The Hired Man at

Southampton, I was invited to join the Director and new Producer for a drink

in the interval. I was introduced to a certain ANDREW LLOYD WEBBER

After chatting away for quite sometime, when it came to settle the tab, I was left

on my own! No wonder he's so bloody rich!

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THEATRE TRIVIA

Scenery built in metric instead of standard - scenery so big -

would not fit the stage!

When building PAIGNTON'S FESTIVAL THEATRE

Once the orchestra pit had been completed,

it took one of the builder's kids (watching workmen finishing off) to ask:

"Dad! How do the musicians get into it?"

No doors had been provided.

JOYCE GRENFELL

Appearing in her highly successful An Evening With at the Nuffield Southampton, was I gather using a throat mic for the very first time (early days of technology!)

She was asked by the Stage Manager, when not actually on stage to switch the wretched thing off. Came the interval, she retired to the ladies' room. She not only stayed there for quite sometime but had unfortunately forgotten the Stage Manager's request, I leave the rest to your imagination.

WILFRED LAWSON

Well known for his liquour intake, appeared at the Royal Court in Kelly's Eye with Nicol Williamson and during a rehearsal, vanished. Nicol was not well pleased and screamed abuse concerning Wilfred's behaviour, when suddenly from the back of the stalls Wilfred's voice boomed "I thought that speech had been cut!"

SIR JOHN GIELGUD

"Do you see that man, just coming in?"

Asking his dinner companion in a restaurant one day.

"He's the biggest bore in London - second only to Edward Knoblock"

Unfortunately, Gielgud had momentarily forgotten the identity of his

dinner companion - Edward Knoblock.

"Not you, ofcourse" he awkwardly added

"I mean the other Edward Knoblock".

RUDOLF NUREYEV

Sitting in the stalls with the company's Director watching the Dress Rehearsal,

"Tell your fucking girls to get their fucking arses round"

She stood up and shouted

"More body girls!"

PRINCESS MARGARET

A young man searching valiantly for her identity across a crowded room

'How are you getting on these days?'

'Fairly' she told him

'The old firm still flourishes eh?'

'You could say say that'

'Your sister still well I hope, still flourishing?'

'Still Queen'

LEW GRADE

When he was an agent and went to the old Metropolitan Edgeware Road he once saw an act called Winters and Fielding, which he thought was great. He rushed backstage to tell them how he would make them stars, get them big salaries, much better than their present agents.

On finishing, he added 'By the way, who are your agents?'

They replied, 'Lew and Leslie Grade'.

RUDOLF NUREYEV

After completing a brilliant performance at the Royal Festival Hall.

On leaving by the front entrance, and descending the main staircase, was stopped by the Company's Director.

"Rudi, you were simply sensational tonight are you going home now?"

"No!" growled Rudi, "I go for a cruise".

With that, he disappeared into the night air.

The Director turned to her companion:

"I didn't know Rudi had a boat!"

SO'S THIS!!

While working the follow spots at the Savoy Hotel my work colleague, who during the day was running the prompt corner for a very long running and hugely successful thriller. Well into the run, to pass the time, he took it upon himself to read yet another Agatha Christie. Came the end of Act I, while still engrossed in his book, he gave the House Curtain warning followed by what he thought to be the ‘Go’. After a few moments he automatically switched on the working-light. The leading lady playing a blind character and who ends up on the floor behind the settee, noticing the working-light, immediately stood up and removed her wig. On turning out front, discovered to her horror, 800 pairs of eyes staring in amazement!